You may have come across the phrase Law of Attraction and have an inkling about what it is… something to do with energy? Or spirituality? Beliefs? Something a bit woo-woo? To my mind, it is a blend of several areas, some of which overlap.
- The Power of Positive Thinking
- Positive Psychology
- Conversations with Higher Self
Let’s take each in turn and explore more. Then we can see how the areas broaden out into the concepts surrounding Law of Attraction. From this you can create a concept that works for you.
- THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING
This is a mindset practice that focuses on the Glass Half Full (as opposed to Half Empty) principle. It doesn’t mean that we ignore negative thoughts, this would mean gaslighting (undermining, ignoring) the expansiveness of our thoughts and feelings. It should not be confused with toxic positivity which also negates any experiences that do not support our purpose. See my blog on Coaching with Self-Compassion for more on embracing the light and the shade of our lives. For me, the power of positive thinking arises from holding two basic principles in all situations:
- Everything changes
- I have survived this far and shall continue to do so
These two tenets strengthened since I became a certified coach. I am inspired every day by the changes my clients bring into their lives. Read more here Three Surprising Things I Learnt From Being A Coach.
Affirmations are statements about yourself that create a positive resonance around you. They should be Positive, Personal, and Present Tense. You can write them down, think them, or speak them. I do mine in the morning while making my bed. I say them out loud and they often relate to putting a positive reframe on current tricky situations. For example, if parenting has been a challenge I could say: I am a loving parent, I am a nurturing parent. If I have been let down by a friend I might say: I deserve to be valued, I deserve to be respected.
Manifestations are thoughts and/or behaviours that call in things you want for your future. You can find manifestation notebooks online that have diagrams and drawings giving guidance on creating powerful manifestations. For example, two years ago I drew a cheque for a small but needed amount of money, I signed and dated it. A month later I received an unexpected payment for some work! Manifestations can also be used to call in positive mental shifts.
- POSITIVE PSYCHOLOGY
“Positive psychology is the scientific study of what makes life most worth living” (Peterson, 2008). It explores “positive human functioning and flourishing on multiple levels that include the biological, personal, relational, institutional, cultural, and global dimensions of life” (Seligman & Csikszentmihalyi, 2000). Positive Psychologists do not focus on fixing what is “wrong or dysfunctional” they look at how clients can move into new healthy spaces. Coaching runs alongside this ethos, we will help our clients to understand the reality of Now and imagine into a dreamed of future. Our clients explore potential blocks and steps that can lead to this new place. We create space for exploration of healthy mindsets and practices that improve wellbeing.
- CONVERSATIONS WITH A HIGHER SELF
See my blog on Journaling for Coaches for more ideas on now to do this. There are many ways of conceptualising your Higher Self so feel free to travel down a Google voyage of discovery! I first heard this phrase in Alcoholics Anonymous meetings where we were encouraged to release control of people, places, and things, and yield to a power outside of our control that wants the best for us. AA talks about Higher Power or God being yours to so define. I liked one description that God stands for Great Out Doors. Certainly for me Nature holds a strength that guides me. So by going for a walk in nature and thought-journaling a conversation with the Great Out Doors I am able to bring my wished for state further into reality. I thought journal a conversation with my Higher Power about family, friends, lovers, work, any area that needs my attention.
There are several concepts that sit within Law of Attraction. Here are a few:
- Deliberately directing your thoughts changes vibrational patterns which Law of Attraction responds to.
- Focus on what you want, not what you don’t want. Whatever you focus on (positive or negative) will be called into your attention.
- We spend most of our time collecting data to help us decide what we want. The real work is deciding what we want to focus on, so we can attract it.
It takes time to ensure we are focusing on the positives. When I decided to give up alcohol eight years ago I kept telling myself, “I choose not to drink.” This felt clunky, and after a while I worked out this intention was not bringing in flow. As soon as I changed my daily manifestation to, “I choose health” things felt more easeful.
This is a variation on an exercise in the book, Law of Attraction by Esther & Jerry Hicks. It clarifies and enhances what you want, and creates a mindset shift into the belief you can achieve it.
- Write down something you want in as much detail as possible
- Write down the reasons you want this, again in as much detail as possible
- Write down the reasons that you Believe you will have this
- Diarise to return to this list in a week’s time and examine what has changed
- Amend points 1, 2, 3
- Add in an action that will bring you 1% closer to what you want
Law of Attraction can be viewed as a regular practice. We owe it to ourselves to call in our actions and thought processes to continuously create an exciting new future.
THE PSYCHOLOGY OF YOU
When I first came across Law of Attraction I could see how it blended in with other concepts I learnt in my BSc Psychology degree.
Perceptual set refers to when you tune in on something and it seems like you are then surrounded by it. When you want to buy a red coat, suddenly everyone is wearing red coats! There aren’t more people wearing red coats, your attention has shifted and you are calling them in.
Cognitive Distortions are thought processes that can tamper with the way we see the world. Here are some examples:
- “Black and white thinking” refers to seeing things in polars and changeable, and ignores that life sits on a continuum
- “Overgeneralisation” means using terms like Always and Never, and they skew reality
- “Emotional Reasoning” is when we jump to conclusions about an emotion without delving further into the potential nuances of the situation
These concepts remind me how powerfully our thoughts influence our behaviours. And in turn how we impact those around us. Most of us want to have a positive impact in this world, and it starts with you!
Which of the concepts in this blog resonates with you? Where has Law of Attraction worked for you? Post below.
- BOOK: The Law of Attraction, by Esther & Jerry Hicks
- BOOK: The Secret, by Rhonda Byrne
- RESOURCE: Search for Manifestation Journals online
- ARTICLE: Positive Thinking: Definition, Benefits, and How to Practice (verywellmind.com)
- TRAINING: Law of Attraction is a topic covered in the Certified Relationship Coach Training launching on 1st April 2023. More information here: Relationship Coach – Radiant Coaches Academy
Ali Hendry, Education Director (Europe)
Radiant Coaches Academy